Scoreboard

So this past week my sister and I have been housesitting together for my mom in Farragut. So all week I have been switching from my little abode in Market Square to a perfectly manicured lawn in Farragut. This week has meant going to strength classes with my sister and watching her walk bowlegged for days. We have put cheese wiz on pills and fed them to the dog and nearly killed a tomato plant. Honestly. How do you people keep those things alive? Honestly. So one week and this is the last day. This day, Sunday, a long day's looooooong day and I drove from downtown out west for the 9th time in 5 days for the finale of Abby and Jen's house sitting adventure 2010. I was exhausted, done, over, spent, pooped and because coffee does not equal fewd, I was also so hungry that I seriously considered getting dinner at a gas station. "Dinner". because that, my 3 loyal readers, is what it has come to on days like these. But instead I went home and found Abby there, who had very nearly gone to Menchies to drown her own Sunday sorrows in froyo.Let us be real, who among us has not been there? So without our own respective pathetic dinners of menchies and gas station station delicacies we fended for ourselves: Abby was making a veggie burger and put in a tortilla and said outloud, Hello White Trash. I was out of saltines and was seriously jonesing for my new fav snack, I put oyster crackers and jelly on a spoon and ate them leaning against the counter while Abby read me blogs (by blogs I mean Texts From Last Night, blogs just sounds a little smarter). I made myself some eggs. At 24, making eggs is my newest skill. Abby found this hilarious earlier this week when I called her at work to ask her how to do it. If I ever find myself on internet/personal ad dating, if I ever give up gas station dinners on Sunday and give that a whirl instead, I will now be able to list making eggs as one of my marketable and desireable relationship skills. Single White Female. Can make eggs. I ate these man-magnet eggs at the kitchen table while the dog stared at me with a very concerned look at his face which I can only assume is trying to tell me, "Sour Cream and Onion chips from Pilot would probably have been a better decision." Could not have agreed more, dear doggy. Single White Female. Have chips, will travel. So Abby's Sunday was that kinda DAY too and we sat over the empty plate of eggs and compared our wounds and decided the next natural step to cheer ourselves up would be to go rent movies and buy diet mountian dews and packs of gum. Duh. So we drove to Weigels and listened to a combination of Sting Fields of Gold ( When he says something about the fields of Barley, Abby made some connection to Barleys and out loud wondered if Sting was singing about picking someone up at bar) and then a bad cover of Tupac's Changes, which is so appri-pro right now, as Tupac always is. And I had to smile, hearing Elton John's The Bitch is Back on the radio thanks to the fine folks over at B97.5. We had an unsuccessful attempt at Redbox and instead went home and went home to rewatch a fifties version of Leonardo Decaprio wear a Newsies hat in his reunion with Kate Winslet in Revolutionary Road. This is a good movie for the time period of the fifties and the clothes and places and things, but a terrible movie about relationships. So, naturally this was a perfect movie for the almost-resorted-to-froyo-kind of night. So Abby and I bedded down on the couch with the dog and diet cokes and toasted our lives on this Sunday, the land of singledom, all the problems we don't have. As Abby said, "Here's to not dodging right hooks on the side of route 12." Amen to that.

So sports fans, Here's the scoreboard:

Cheese Wiz 0. Goldberg 1.
Whoever covered Tupac 0. Tupac throwbacks anytime 1.
Sour Cream and Onion Chips 1. My eggs 0.
Abby's White Trash Gyro 1. Menchies 0.
Sweltering East Tennessee Heat 1. Tomato Plant R.I.P.
Toilet Humor and cocktails with my sister 1. Crying into your diet mountain dew alone 0.

This blog has been brought to you by Kate Winslet's costume's designer, Free range eggs, and "that's just the way it is", the air conditioning newly fixed in my car, and new mercies for a better tomorrow morning.